The Last Piece
“The Last Piece” - by Elicia Ward
Original painting measures 600mm x 450mm
I keep giving away the final piece because I don’t feel good enough to feel whole.
I never want other people to suffer the way I have. I never want them to endure the pain alone... So I fix & rescue others as a deflection, avoiding my responsibility to heal myself. By averting my attention to another I continue the cycle of feeling deeply unaccepted & unloveable...
I am afraid to face the last piece, for this means I have to accept that some people who I love don’t actually have the ability to love me back.
They don’t have the capacity to accept me, understand me, or show they care. This is something I’m no longer willing to fight, I must concede to this fact & let those people go so I can feel whole.
I concede not out of lack of trying but cause it’s simply a waste of energy & all the trying keeps me broken, stealing happiness & security from what would otherwise be a fulfilled life.
Today I choose to accept my weirdness, & ditch all efforts in trying to convince my family that I am worthwhile of their time, I’m worthwhile of my time. My husband, child & my chosen family all know how to love me & that is enough.